If we just choose to see it. by River Bennett

River Bennett (Photography River Bennett)

I'd had one of those  'I want to shoot myself!' (not literally) kind of mornings.

My 2 yr. old son Rome wasn't wanting to sleep through the night, for whatever reason, and the last few nights, due to exhaustion, I had caved and let him sleep next to us in our bed.
Together with his deep breathing in my face (that can sometimes smell like a dead cat), and a few kicks and slaps to my body, I was living on a few headspins and positive thinking - 'I will not be grumpy, I choose to be a happy mum, I choose to see the good in life even though I want to throw my kids out the window...' (not literally, but almost.)

I had rushed to get everyone showered and dressed ready before 8am.
I had to compromise with Rome, as he threw a tantrum, that if he chose the shirt, I choose the shoes. I had already saved Knox (my 1 yr. old) from eating a dead cockroach that lay shell-shocked on the floor due to someone pulling off it's legs.
I had discovered poo on my kitchen floor, rummaged through a pile of washing to find myself some clothes. Why is there poo on my kitchen floor?!
I then discovered that I had no bread, nor food to give the baby. The aroma of vomit wafted past me. On a quick mission to find where it was coming from I turned the kitchen wall to find it on the floor being smeared across the tiles by Knox (at least it was the tiles).
His clothes had been destroyed, and now he stank of sour milk. SO gross.
I proceeded to change him, sprayed him with some Marc Jacobs and then discovered I now needed to change (because vomit somehow likes to gravitate towards me).
I proceeded, half dressed, to feed the children Weetbix (with no honey - because there was none) and made sure that if they felt like complaining about the no honey thing that I would be sure to put the Weetbix up their ... nose.
Finally, I herded them out the door, shoeless, praying that shoes and yesterday's socks would be in the car. I warned the kids to be on their best behavior because we are going to church!  

"And Rome, don't ask me for any food because I have none, (please Jesus let there be raisin toast and fruit as I walk in the door to Church)."

"And Zion (5 yrs), yes you can take your shoes off when you are at Kids."

"And Rome, no crying when Mummy drops you off because I WILL come get you as soon as church is over."

"Everyone say 'OK Mum!'"

"OK Mum!"

I take a quick look at myself in the car mirror.
I really need to go and get my eyebrows done and darn it!  I forgot mascara. Great ...
Of course the rain poured down while unloading the kids and everything else out of the car at Church, and I worried about the 'cowlick' in my hairline and thought maybe I could dry my hair under the hand dryers in the Ladies room. Oh stuff it, who cares!

After everyone was delivered to their spots in the Kids program, I found a spot to sit down, breathed a few deep breaths, and thought of a happy place, and thanked God that this season won't last forever - because seasons never do. I reminded myself that I will probably miss this season when the boys are all grown up, and I thought how grateful I am for my family - my sweet little men - and how grateful I am that I am able to stay home and invest into their lives daily. I felt grateful that they are strong and healthy, and blessed that I even had them at all.

Yep, all it took was a moment to realise that what I have is actually pretty amazing.

As crazy as life can be in the motherhood domain, with babies and sleepless nights, with vomit and nappies and toddlers, I hope today you can take a minute to look at your life and be grateful for what you do have.

Life is rich with blessing if we just chose to see it.

Much love,

Riv XO